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Monday, 7 October 2013

Developers vs Testers vs Project Managers

Developers vs Testers vs Project Managers

Developers vs Testers vs Project Managers debate is never ending. Who is right, who is wrong, who is culprit, who is victim...only God knows!! During the project development and testing, developers, testers and project managers come across a lot of situations which they handle differently. Blame games between developers and testers is always played at many phases of project development. I have gathered and listed down some funny things about developers, testers and project managers...

1. What is Testing?

To tell somebody that he is wrong is called criticism. To do so officially is called testing.

2. Law of Bugs

Bugs can neither be created nor be removed from software by a developer. It can only be converted from one form to another. The total number of bugs in the software always remains constant.

3. How many testers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Testers do not fix problems; they just find them.

4. How many developers does it take to change a light bulb?

Answer 1: What’s the problem? The bulb at my desk works fine!
Answer 2: None. That’s a hardware problem.

5. Sign On Developer's Doors

Do not disturb. Already disturbed!

6. Similarity between SAINT and IT PROFESSIONAL

Long back, a person who sacrificed his SLEEP, forgot his FAMILY, forgot his FOOD, forgot LAUGHTER, were called "SAINTS"

But now they are called..."IT Professionals"...........!

7. A Banner in front of an IT company:

Drive Slowly, Don't kill our Employee...

..... Leave them to us

8. Developers vs Testers vs Project Managers

A) In Software industry

Forgiving or punishing the Developer is left to Manager.
But, Fixing their appointment with Manager is our responsibility.

---Tester

Forgiving or punishing the Manager is left to Client.
But, fixing their appointment with Client is our responsibility.

---Developer  

B) Thinking of Project Managers, Developers and Testers

A Project Manager is the one who thinks 9 women can deliver a baby in 1 month.
An Onsite Coordinator is the one who thinks 1 woman can deliver 9 babies in 1 month.
A Developer is the one who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver 1 baby.
A Marketing Manager is the one who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.
A Client is the one who doesn’t know why he wants a baby.
A Tester is the one who always tells his wife that this is not the right baby.

C) Project Managers want it to work. Developers try to make it work. Customers hope it works. Testers know how it works.

9. Some Software Testing Quotes

A) I don’t make software; I make software better.
B) Software Testers don’t break software; it’s broken when we get it.
C) Testers don’t like to break things; they like to dispel the illusion that things work.
D) Software Testers: We break it because we care.
E) To err is human; to find the errors requires a tester.
F) There’s always one more bug.
G) Testing Delayed is Testing Denied
H) Those are the bugs, if you don’t like them…I have others.
I) Only certainties in life: Death, taxes and bugs in code!
J) If it works, its the developer, if not it’s QA.
K) It compiled on your system, but it committed suicide on mine!
L) We don’t create defects, we just find yours.
M) In God we trust, and for everything else we test.
N) A bug in the hand is better than one as yet undetected.

10. Signs That You’re Dating A Tester

A) Your love letters get returned to you marked up with red ink, highlighting your grammar and spelling mistakes.
B) When you tell him that you won’t change something he has asked you to change, he’ll offer to allow you two other flaws in exchange for correcting this one.
C) When you ask him how you look in a dress, he’ll actually tell you.
D) When you give him the “It’s not you, it’s me” breakup line, he’ll agree with you and give the specifics.
E) He won’t help you change a broken light bulb because his job is simply to report and not to fix.
F) He’ll keep bringing up old problems that you've since resolved just to make sure that they’re truly gone.
G) In the bedroom, he keeps “probing” the incorrect “inputs”.

11. Words

Developer: There is no I in TEAM
Tester: We cannot spell BUGS without U

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I have more than 10 years of experience in IT industry. Linkedin Profile

I am currently messing up with neural networks in deep learning. I am learning Python, TensorFlow and Keras.

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